I am a giant ball of hormones. You have been warned.

I realize that I have tons of hormones coursing through my body and I’m always overtired, but I seriously don’t think I’ve ever felt this annoyed on a regular basis in my life. I know that people want to know more about what’s going on with the pregnancy and are just trying to be nice, but UGH. And I’m not even to the unwanted belly touching phase yet!

First of all, when someone asks, “How are you?” I usually respond with a nice, “I’m fine, thanks. How are you?” Apparently this is not the correct answer for a pregnant person, and they will call you out on it. Apparently you must answer with something pregnancy-related and probably pretty personal or you will continue to be questioned for the next 10 minutes.

Let’s also talk about this gem: “Are you sure you should be eating/drinking that?” YES I’M SURE NOW LEAVE ME ALONE. And don’t suggest I swap my chips/pretzels for a piece of fruit/something healthier. Chips are my weakness and I must have them, and I fill up all day on fruit and healthiness so I won’t feel bad about eating them. I don’t need to feel guilty about something like that.

My not-so-favorite thing is the random co-workers (sometimes I don’t even know who they are) ask me really personal stuff, like if you’re going to breastfeed or not. When I respond with something like, “Um, I don’t know… Um, we haven’t really thought that far ahead yet,” they then ask you every single day to see if you’ve made your decision yet and why you have not informed them of this.

Most of the time I try to remind myself that the person in question is just trying to be nice and show an interest, so I hide the fact that I’m annoyed, but sometimes you just gotta rant. Anyway, sorry for the word vomit. I did warn you, though.

Now I think I’ll go take a nap.

P.S. I really do appreciate the fact that people are interested enough to ask me about my pregnancy. If you’re reading this post then I’m probably not talking about you anyway. Please don’t stop asking me how things are going or how I’m doing/feeling, just don’t get into the super weird personal stuff unless it is something we would discuss if I wasn’t pregnant.

P.P.S. When random people do start touching my belly I think I’m just going to touch their bellies back and see how they react. But even the thought of doing that to someone makes me uncomfortable! My new rule: If I would invite you over to my house for any reason, you can touch my belly and I won’t think anything of it. If I don’t know your first name, hands off!